They Just Wanted My Attention

I have been so busy doing free lance work that I haven't been really paying my kids any attention. Even doing homeschooling time, I was present in the room physically but not there mentally.  My kiddos kept acting out which is something completely out of character for them, they are usually well behave. But for two weeks, I have had my head buried in my laptop or my cellphone , answering emails and sending out invoices. The only time I would look up from these two items that had my attention was to fuss at them about doing something that they had no business doing. It gotten to the point where I yelled basically all day, which was out of character for me, that I went to bed thinking what on earth have gotten into my children?!

Then I realized , I wasn't paying any attention or spending time with them. They could sense it and they love the time we spend together. The only way to get my attention was by doing something negative. which in turn would cause me to look up to fuss at  them. It got me thinking how many more kids are out there acting up on purpose just to get their parent's attention??? I knew what I had to do, I had to put down my cellphone and laptop and actually spend time with my children. They needed it more than anything. Sure I was busy working trying to make sure the bills got paid but they are kids and they don't fully understand that. I don't want them to look back at their childhood and be like, my mom was too busy working to spend time with us. I want them to remember all the fun times we had together. 

I felt like an awful mother, My kids were crying out for my attention and I was refusing to give it to them.  I would yell at them to leave me alone cause I was stress out and they weren't the ones to blame. I didn't want them to think that they couldn't come to me with their problems no matter how small or big it may be. I want them to be able to come to me with anything. 

My goal as a single parent is to make sure, I always make time for my kids. So for now on during certain times of the day, my cellphone is on do not disturb, and my laptop is put away. No calls, texts, or emails will be answered because my kids come first. I want to enjoy every minute of their childhood before they are off to college and I am home alone with an empty nest. 

Single Parent Vacation

Some days as a single parent are so stressful , I feel like I am being pulled in so many directions. 

 I would just love to have a vacation getaway on some tropical island. But I know that is impossible because I would miss my children to much and secondly , I don't have the money to go to a tropical island. But I have the next best thing, I like to call them mini vacations. Once I get my children to bed, I go to the bathroom, run me a nice hot bubble bath. Turn off the lights, light some candles, place some scenic sounds like waves crashing on the beach from this sound app that I downloaded to my phone,  have my mini fan blowing , and a nice glass of wine with some chocolate. 

I can close my eyes , listen to the sounds and just enjoy my mini vacation on my tropical island. Here in the tub , I place all my worries and fears aside and just take in the moment. This is a time for reflection and unwinding so I can become the best parent that I can be. So for all my fellow single parents both male and female, the next time you are having a rough day. The very next time you want to throw in the towel but don't because you know that means more laundry for you, Why not set up shop in your bathroom and transport yourself mentally to a tropical island while soaking in a nice hot bubble bath. 

Rainy Days = Fun Outdoors

"I Know it is Wet, and the sun is not sunny. But we can have lots of good fun that is funny! --The Cat in the Hat 

I use to think that rainy days meant that my kids were stuck inside the house and we had to find something to entertain ourselves with before we go bored out of our mind. Especailly when it rains for days on end....my kiddos go nuts from being stuck inside the house.

 That is when I had an idea!!!! Rainy days didn't mean my kiddos were stuck inside playing puzzles, building forts, or coloring , or watching the occasional movie. As long as it was not lightening and thundering we could still have fun in the rain. I decided that we would save our rainy day fun stuff for really bad stormy days, but we will start treating any rainy day like a sunny day. I want my kids to remember rainy days with the same joy as they remember sunny days from their childhood. Time to put on rain boots and head outside to get wet and explore nature in the rain. 

We took a walk through our neighborhood , holding our hands out 

catching raindrops. 

Singing silly songs in the rain, and of course splashing in every puddle we saw. We even made a game of it. Who could make the biggest splash. 

I forgotten all about the joys and giggles that come with splashing in puddles , I dont know what it is or how to describe the delight, that comes from jumping in puddles. 

Just when we made it back to the house the rain got harder that didn't stop the fun for us because there is nothing like dancing in the rain with bare feet 

We even grabed a ball and had a quick game of kick ball in the rain that turned into a game of catch. I am sure the neighbors probably looked out their windows and thought we were a couple of wackos for being out in the rain or that I was a terrible mother for allowing this to take place because my kiddos would be sick the next day but who cares??!! We were making memories and that is all that matters. I really wished I thought about doing this earlier, I dont know what I was thinking, like what was the point of buying rain gear if we weren't going to use it to get wet in the rain while playing?! We retired back inside our dry home , tired but overjoyed with having spent some time outside inside of being stuck in the house. Everyone dried off, and changed from wet clothes to dry clothes and settled down for some hot chocolate with plenty of  marshmellows of course. We discuss what our favorite part of the day was, pure simple family time.

I know my kiddos will look back on this day and days like this and remember that on rainy days , their mother didn't keep them all in the house but let them out to explore the world and all its wonders in the rain. I think the next rainy day we have , if its hot enough we will put on swim suites and pull out the slip and slide and have one wet and wild time. 

Christmas Deals in July At Target

Had to run a couple errands after church, and while at Target I found some awesome deals, that allowed me to start my christmas shopping a little bit early. I for one can't stand being in stores around the holiday seasons cause it is a bit crowded for me. But today I found a couple of items that I purchased for christmas gifts for the kiddos and thanks to my awesome friend who came out shopping with me, for keeping the kiddos busy while I managed to purchase these items. And let me and as a bonus,  that what I purchased was all educational!

Meet Robbi the Robot, He is sorta like a high tech alphie the robot I use to play with as a kid but this one works with the kiddos iPod touch. I saw him a while back in June and my toddler really wanted him but I just wasnt going to pay $39.99 for him. Today he was on clearence for $11.98. 

                                                                              

Next we have some high tech books that will also work the kiddos iPod touch.  They are normally $14.99 but I got them on clearance for $4.48. According to the back of them, itikes came out with 4 different stories in motion books but I only found 3 of them in the store. I even checked online and they were listed as regular price online still. but that is okay, we will have fun learning with the 3 books we got on sale. 

I also found 2 activity / coloring / sticker books normaly $3.95 I got them for $1.48. 

I was extrememly exicted about my deals today , that I decided to go back out looking for deals tommorow , so be on the look out cause I will have more to blog about then. My friend said she would come over and watch the kiddos so I can see what other deals out there can I find and hopefully be finish with my Christmas shopping or at least put a dent in it. As a single parent with only one income, Christmas can put a toll on the family budget. Now my kids understand that Christmas is more then gifts, we talk about the birth of Jesus, and we also do our little family tradtions but every kid wants to wake up with gifts under the tree. And one way that I managed to buy gifts for my kids is putting up $20-$50 a pay period every month so if I find something on sale that I know that they will like I can buy it. And having that money put aside also doesnt put that much of a strain on me if someone asks for a certain toy.  Right now we are off to a good start and I didn't get a chance to really look around Target to see what other deals I could have found because the kiddos started to get fussy and I knew a major melt down was on the way so it was time to purchase my items and get out the door quick. 

No Easy Bake Oven For My Daughter

Recently, my daughter told me that for her birthday she would like to have an easy bake oven. My response was, a simple no. She didn't understand why I told her no, and it broke my heart to see the disappointment in her face. It wasn't that I was trying to be some mean mother who didn't want to fulfill her daughter's one and only birthday wish. I just didn't see the point in buying an easy bake oven. I had one as a kid and its not worth the hype, once the food packages where empty my mother didn't buy anymore and the oven just sat there. Although my daughter didn't understand that, all she knew was that her friends all had one and she herself wanted one so she can bake treats to eat as well. But being a single mom and my income is the only  source we have, I have to make it stretch as much as I can, I just couldn't spend that kind of money on a toy that isn't worth it. 

In my opinion an easy bake oven isn't worth the money and here is why......

spending $44.99 on a toy that barely makes bite size food is totally not worth the the money. I don't care how cute and kid friendly it is, I just do not see myself spending that much money or any money on this toy (even if I found it on sale , clearance, or at a second hand store, I wouldn't spend money on this toy) . this toy is just a money pit waiting to sucked down all your money. Even if my daughter was given this as a gift, I would take it back to the store to return it for something else. Why because after you buy it you must keep continuing to buy the food that goes with it. (and no one is going to spend almost $45 on a toy and not buy the refill packs)  

Are they serious??? $7.99 for a tiny package of food mix that will barely be bite size and look nothing like the picture? Then the food that comes out of the package taste horrible!!!!! Not to mention that once you buy the packages you will also need to buy this crap that is also sold separately

  this stuff is worthless for $19.97 and trust me the pieces will be lost or break forcing you to buy another set. 

I know many of you are thinking, well the easy bake oven is like a teaching tool, a right of passage for a little girl teaching her how to cook. Well My daughter can learn how to cook in the kitchen with me, but I don't want her using the real oven just yet. (she has in the past helped me bake cookies or brownies but I don't want her opening and closing it by herself) So I thought of a solution to this Easy Bake Oven issue we were having. Then while out shopping one Saturday , it hit me on the perfect gift to buy , that is not only affordable but is worth the money and the entire family can still enjoy it and she can bake all the goodies she want. 

For the exact same price as the easy bake oven, I found the Hello Kitty toaster oven in the kitchen appliance section at the store. Although the box says this is not a toy, just like the easy bake oven, adult supervision is required. This was a much better buy because, its a real oven and not a toy, and we both are Hello Kitty Fans so win win. And the treats that we can baked in here can be enjoyed by everyone in our family. With a small cake pan and cookie sheet  ( I already had those at home) we can bake just about anything. Also on the next isle over I found this awesome deal

$10 for 101 cookie cutters. I actually brought two of these, one for use with our play dough and the other for cooking with.  Another win for this momma. 

Even the food that she would be allowed to cook in her new oven was "real food"  not package powder stuff that taste like crap, this food from our grocery store isle is one that would require a teaching and bonding moment between us. and a lot cheaper when you think about that fact that everyone could get a taste of it, not to mention she feels a little bit more responsible about being able to cook her own snacks....Like mini pizza, brownies, cookies , cinnamon rolls, etc. 

these are her favorite snacks to cook in her very on oven and the total that I spent on these two in the grocery store together is about $5 

She was so excited to see this as her birthday gift and I was thrilled knowing that I didn't waste any money on a useless toy. I had a lot of moms come to me and tell me that , that they too wish they had come up with the idea of buying a toaster oven instead of the easy bake oven. This is one birthday gift that get used several times during the day in our house. And she used it just this morning to help me cook breakfast. I had her in charge of making cheese toast and tonight for supper she will be in charge of the garlic bread to go with the lasagna. 

  

Why Does This Blog Exist?

Single parents come in all shapes and forms and from different walks of life. I think its important to define what a single parent is and the different roads that leads to one becoming a single parent'

A Single Parent:

- is a parent, not living with a spouse or partner, who has most of the day-to-day responsibilities in raising the child or children. A single parent is usually considered the primary caregiver.

Factors that makes a person a single parent:

-unintended pregnancy 

-divorce 

- death of a partner 

-single parent adoption

Rather you are a parent who just happens to be single and currently co-parenting or trying to co-parent  with your partner or the only parent your child knows,  if this single parenting life was thrown upon you by the death of your partner or an unintended pregnancy or divorce; no matter how you ended up on this path, I hope you find something from this blog that you can use in your own journey in parenting your kids.  For Single Parents faces a completely different level of stress and problems/challenges. It is my goal for this blog to inspire you and bring you hope in your journey as I chronicle our journey on this path of single parenthood.

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